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On the other hand, people with that sort of experience tend to have the worst instincts when it comes to actual maintenance and long-term development of projects. They're great at starting projects, and fast too, but rarely considers the design carefully enough so you don't need a full rewrite once every year just to continue being able to add features. Slow is fast in those cases, and the people who are experts in "greenfield SaaS MVP launches" basically operate with short-term expedience traded for long-term maintainability.

Not to say they cannot learn that, but worth being aware if you're building something long-term and does hiring for that sort of project, to be upfront that the development process will likely be very different compared to what they're used to.

> It doesn't pay well, and the work can be brutal (nights and weekends; on-call) but it's a great way to get the experience needed to get the job that does if you're starting from zero.

sadly that's a non-starter for a lot of people in this economy. doubly so if you have kids.

You are what I've started to call "34yo Patrice".

34yo Patrice has a stable job, a fiancé and broadly speaking has his life in order.

Nobody in his circle knows he dropped out of high school, got in the wrong crowd and, inevitably, did time.

This archetype is a mix of several people I've met and I usually mention it when a younger person says this and that thing (e.g. dropping out of college) is the end of the world for them. In your 20s it commonly isn't and you can start from scratch - after a decade or so nobody will have any idea about this unless you tell them.

i’ve been through all of this, and it turned out fine. seriously people don’t hold a drug bust against you, if you can do the job. i’ve lived on the road, camped in Golden Gate Park, attended several Rainbow Gatherings, etc. after spending years in India as a monk, i couldn’t find a place in american society. i bootstrapped a new identity that let me live as a teacher and developer; but i had to move to Śrī Laṅkā to do it.

Looking In retrospect, if you were a policy maker today how would you try to prevent the new generation for having to go through this (today your path likely would not be viable due to fentanyl).

Sweet Jesus. What a hell of a post! You need to turn this into a e-book or a series of blog posts. They would be a big hit on HN.

Was there any bullying at school that kept you away from it? Or boredom? Or just culture ? Grade schools seem all right in the US. Ridiculous amounts of activities/sports right there, teachers are well paid (compared to the rest of the world), the program difficulty seem pretty chill for any kid that learned to read early enough.

Did you ever bounce around the crackmonkey list? nick and friends seemed to know people with similar backgrounds.

That is an absolutely crazy story, I hope you have it written down somewhere besides HN comments lol

So... going by the story, I guess you never did go to the doctor to get diagnosed for adhd?

(Yeah, armchair doctor and all that. But doesn't make it wrong or at least worth a look.)

I'm a Tradesman Baker (4 year apprenticeship and a 12 month pre-apprenticeship), that about 2 years after being a fully qualified tradesman switched to IT and have been in the industry for about 28 years. I suspect it will be my last porfession

> albeit without the drug addiction or prison.

No disrespect, but this is not at all comparable to the situation described in the article. A few nights sleeping on the streets is much (!) easier when not addicted to substances.

Nitpick but,

> without the drug addiction

and

> beer stealing

doesn't compute.

Also recommend folks check out Unlocked Labs, who run a prison program for this sort of thing. Jessica is an angel:

https://unlockedlabs.org/

Thank you for that link. I recommend reading to the very last line.

Writing articles by hand isn’t just smart— it’s important. No shortcuts. No filler. No excuses.

Key insight: relying on AI for writing assistance helps neither the author nor the audience.

He would tell you that he's sorry he let you and everyone else around him down. That he didn't get to fix the bridges he burned, and mend the people he hurt.

That every time he came down from his high and was lying in bed unable to sleep, the guilt was like an ocean devouring him. That tonight would be the last time he would ever touch anything.

That he wanted to stop, knew he should stop, but when you wake up sweating & shaking all logic leaves your mind and the only thing you can think of is where to get more.

That it's not your (or anyone else's) fault, you did nothing wrong, and quite probably everything right. Some of us are just born with demons on our shoulder that won't stop whispering in our ear.

He would tell you of all the the plans he had come up with over the years, to make up the lost time with you and the rest of his loved ones. Doing things that YOU want to do, just to make you happy, because he had been selfish enough and you were owed at least that much.

That when things were their darkest, and he felt his lowest, one of the few saving graces and safe havens in his mind were the times he spent with you, before he fell into this pit of darkness.

---

I am, genuinely, sorry to hear that. Not in a "my condolences way", but in a grief-ridden and deeply personal way.

I lost my father and several of my closest friends to fentanyl. I know your grief. I know the feeling of anger that also gives you guilt, that they should have robbed the people that loved them most of the opportunity to experience them, and robbed themselves of the bright future they were capable of having.

Nothing I, or anyone else says, can make it any better.

I shed tears while writing this. Nico mourns for you as much as you mourn for him.

The job market is rough. My wife went back to school for audio/sound design, finished the program + got a bunch of certifications.

She's been trying to get anything, even an unpaid internship, doing sound design, going to local meetups, online conferences, and hasn't had much luck.

But I told her: it's just a matter of persistence and time. If you're agreeable to be around, passionate about something, and just show up everyday, eventually something is likely to happen.

The answer to AI resume filter is AI, if you are not utilizing it as part of your job application process to magnify your output then you are likely going to get bottlenecked from the supply side of the market.

Not following how that is relevant to the article at hand?

> I could've never imagined long-term-thinking like this from a former addict.

I know a couple people who recovered from addiction (and lost a few who sadly couldn’t).

They’re just people from all walks of life. There are a lot of stereotypes about addicts, but drug addiction can hit anyone. The first few people I knew who became addicts were actually from good families, were educated, had good career prospects, and were happy people. They thought addiction didn’t apply to them because they were too smart or happy or wealthy. In my opinion, those stereotypes made them more vulnerable to letting their guard down and thinking they were going to use the drugs smartly.

Most of them are recovered now and back on track, minus a large chunk of their younger years and a trail of destroyed relationships and wasted opportunities. You wouldn’t peg them as former addicts, though. They’re just people.

> I could've never imagined long-term-thinking like this from a former addict.

Nothing personal, but you are part of the problem here. You are why these stories are so rare and difficult to achieve. Not out of malice on your part, most likely. But addicts are not humans to you. Please rethink some things.

  > I'm curious how many with similar stories think they would have or could have taken a different path with better or different parental support?

I only respond to extreme, repeated negative reinforcement. Positive reinforcement never did anything for me.

If your child responds to positive reinforcement in any way, there's a good chance you can support them through it. But if they're like me, they may "only learn the hard way."

And I don't mean negative reinforcement as in physical punishment or being talked down to, but having to live through direct negative consequences of your action.

Sometimes I think "what if I could go back in time, and tell myself not to do XYZ", but I know myself well enough that I'm sure I would not listen.

I sincerely hope that things pan out for your family.

If you want the nuclear option, can you move away from the current environment? If they're young enough not to have a car, that's one way to at least guarantee a "fresh start" where they can't actively go down the current path. They'd need to find a new way into trouble, which is still wholly possible but requires more effort at least.

Thank you!!

I will not get started on the US Criminal "Justice" system. I could write a book on the horrors I saw in there.

We need a bigger emphasis on rehabilitation. It ultimately costs LESS for society.

I can also tell you from my 3 years in prison + jail that the grand majority of people in there do not have the innate desire or intention to change.

But for the small percentage that do, they deserve the resources and opportunity.

I’m sorry if i’m missing something… what does this have to do with his story other than addiction and felony?

(fwiw i agree regardless, don’t get a motorcycle, lost too many friends to accidents or the following addiction)

Have you ever been on a motorcycle?

Closest feeling you can get to flying and a helluva lot cheaper.

Bike costs are line noise, (cheap!) planes I fly are better part of $200 an hour.

I get what you're saying though. Barely been on bike since latest baby and wondering if I should just sell them for now.

As much as I miss riding and wife misses riding with me, if the worst were to happen, yikes.

if you do, I’d recommend taking motorcycle safety courses on a regular cadence in order to practice your skills. even if you’re a regular rider it’s great to learn the limits of your bike and do emergency maneuvers in a controlled environment

there’s lots offered near the bay area (where I’m from) and they don’t cost that much for what you’re getting in return

I ride. No way in hell I'd ride in the US.

That's horrible but also a stark reminder for how quickly life can change for any one of us...

You could make a similar argument for bicycles.

Apparently the numbers for bicycles are a bit better, even in adjusted terms, but still. They're very unsafe in general.

It's only been a week; right?

HD riders are known for not using decent safety equipment and that bullshit open helmet or none.

A freaking motorcycle with 300+ kilos moving ate highway speeds or more.

Motorcycles aren't invulnerable 3 ton steel tanks but the stats and anecdotes are deceptive. They're really not that bad if you're not a moron, even if you're mostly worried about other road users. The stat are wildly bimodal.

~30% of deaths involve drunk riding

~30% of deaths involve not wearing any helmet (let alone full face ECE 22.06 rated ones or any other gear at all)

~30% of deaths involve someone with no motorcycle licence.

These aren't all mutually exclusive obviously, rather the Venn diagram probably looks rather...circular.

The issue isn't so much everyone trying to kill you, you can fix a lot of the visibility issues and you have some additional options if someone is about to hit you. The problem is that two wheels make for a VERY dynamic system and you're managing two different brakes with weight shifting between two wheels based on your inputs. To that end ABS and TCS are absolutely huge, IIRC something like >60% safety improvement.

Tldr don't buy an old retro bike with no safety systems and ride it drunk without a license or gear, you'll continue to pad the numbers.

as someone who just got back from a nice motorcycle group ride: lol

Get a motorcycle. Definitely don't get a HD though.

  > When I came into a position to make my own hiring calls, I tried paying that forward, and I got some great employees from it. Arguably a couple duds as well, but I never regretting giving the chance.

I'll be honest, a lot of it was my wife. And also hitting my lowest bottom after becoming homeless and penniless.

So a combination of looking at what I had done to myself + everyone around me and going "what the fuck." and my ever-vigilant wife who knew I had the capacity and desire to get better.

For me it really took literally losing everything.

I’ve been > 20 years sober. For me it was just music. I’m obsessed with a band who preaches sobriety in their lyrics and lifestyle.

Recovered opiate addict and for me it was a mix of everything: Some advice I had gotten from NA meetings, finally doing something about the other mental health issues I was dealing with, and most importantly: medications that prevented me from using (methadone/suboxone).

It was definitely a process (that included multiple jail stints and only god knows how many treatment centers), but 10 years later life is pretty awesome.

I think the stigma around methadone is causing a ton of harm. Having a program where you quite literally have to show up every day, take drug tests, and get counseling was really important.

the secret is to hate drinking and never drink

I'll be honest -- if the pace of AI improvement continues at the current rate, I'm not sure I'll have a job in a few years' time.

Right now, the reason why you need humans in the loop is because you need someone with deep domain expertise and understanding of the particular nuances and architectural history behind a software product.

The reasons LLM's can't do this job currently is not an INHERENT limitation -- it's a technical one around context window limits and documentation.

There will always be people who don't want entirely autonomous development (who do you blame/fire when things go wrong) though.

I realize that it's not PRACTICAL advice, but I really do think if building software is what you're INTERESTED in, you should still give it your best try.

You spend the majority of your experienced life at work. Doing something you don't want to do, or find uninteresting, for most of your life (even though for many people this is the case) is a depressing and bleak prospect.

You may as well spend your time and energy trying to do something you like, because you're sort of stuck with it.

Poor kid just had ADHD and his whole life got ruined tha is to backwards prohibition

Yeah I feel like there's less discussion than I expected of how many different things had to be done utterly ass backwards wrong by society for this guy to have his downward spiral in the first place.

Thank you for asking. I didn't want to disclose it publicly, but when we met she was in a very bad place in life and actually had a planned suicide date.

It wasn't until years later she told me this.

We were able to send her back to university a second time to study something she is passionate about; she has a great support network of friends and (my) family. (Her family are drug addicts and gang members, so my family has sort of adopted her. It's a bit sad but none of her family were invited to our wedding.)

She's unemployed, but she's trying, and she says she never imagined that she could be so lucky in life.

  > and less likely to be high always while programming

It will even get to the point where you feel dependent on them to focus and "get things done", like being sober is a handicap.

Not really.

I'm a recovering addict, felon, and have depression (lucky me). And though there were times where I could work an entire weekend without stopping, it was always followed by 2-3 days of doing absolutely nothing because I was so dope sick/depressed. The worse my addiction got, the shorter the "flow" period and the longer the recovery period took.

  > How can someone get up in such a difficult situation?

Survivorship bias... many people don't, the stories of the few that do are impressive and worthy of hearing.

wtf xd

Thank you Brandon, you're a good bit more talented than me in my $0.02 but it's been awesome to work with you, too =)

I'm glad! It sounds really corny, but someone once told me "The only thing you can choose in life is your attitude."

Sometimes it felt like I'd never get a break, things wouldn't get better. But I tried to tell myself "Every occurrence in life is a numbers game. Against tiny odds, eventually enough attempts statistically OUGHT to pay off."

And the alternative is bleak, sort of sulking in this pit of despair without hope for tomorrow.

I love this question! Because yes, this one has a happy ending =)

I had estranged my mother, didn't really talk to my adoptive father, and purposefully kept my maternal grandparents (who I am closest with) in the dark because I didn't want them to see me like this.

I also have 3 much younger sisters, who I didn't talk to for the same reasons as the grandparents.

I've made a HUGE effort to reconnect and make amends with my family. I'm on good terms with my parents and talk to both of them regularly, I explained to my grandparents after I got sober and visit them at least once a year, and I reconnected with my siblings who I now text regularly and we host a "sibling trip" where we get together over a weekend once each year.

I am very grateful that they saw my efforts and gave me a second chance. My oldest sister in particular was very wary.

No, try reading it again.

"a legal "Research Chemical" with effects similar to MDMA (Methylone/bk-MDMA)"

Someone that is quick to assume without reading could easily make this mistake.. there are my research chemicals that are not technically categorized and not MDMA.

Read about Sasha to start https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alexander_Shulgin

> it’s precisely because of personal responsibility that you are so successful.

No it's not. It's absolutely not personal responsibility that gets people through addiction.

And if you read the entire article, this should stand out:

> I don't tell this story because I think it is clean, heroic, or universally applicable -- It isn't. I made TERRIBLE choices. I hurt people who loved me. I wasted chances that other people would have killed for. And even when I finally started doing the right things, I still needed luck, help, timing, forgiveness, and people willing to judge me by what I could do next instead of only by what I had done before.

That doesn't sound like personal responsibility that sounds like having people around you that stick around even after you mess up.

I've been an addict for over 20 years (and spent the last 10 clean). I've been in close to a dozen treatment centers. What set me apart from the others (and why I technically "made" it) had very little to do with me. What set me apart was having an insane support system and grace from people who loved me.

I was fortunate to have the help of others ("No man is an island unto himself") but I do think that having the mindset of not being owed anything helped me keep a positive perspective when things were their worst.

I'm not political, but I would consider myself left-leaning Libertarian.

My mother is an Ayn Rand-loving die-hard Libertarian that was very active in politics. She gave me a lot of her books that I read in my youth.

I was raised in a very "The world owes you nothing, you only deserve what you earn." and "by your bootstraps" capitalist family.

(Family did not pay for my first car, my community college, etc. "Go get a job, you bum!")

Sure, if you are in the same situation with access to loads of money and good connections, the sky's the limit.

lol what?

  > sobriety doesn’t guarantee that AI companies won’t kill off what’s left of your career

The ironic thing is, I work for one of those "AI Companies" ;^)

Claude Code and Codex have done most of my work for the last year, and with the pace of AI improvement, I'm not sure that you'd need (or even want) me in the mix.

From a business perspective, it makes a lot of financial sense, too.

I'm sure it's a limited amount of time before I'm dead weight, but I'll cross that bridge when I get to it, and I'll figure something out if/when it happens =)

Have an upvote. Sobriety is an expectation. I will say though that people I’ve known who went through the journey are some of the smarter people I’ve met. Not all of them, but the whole numbing yourself because your brain can’t quite understand all the thoughts it has, that’s a real thing. Probably sounds insane, but it’s real.

  > I haven't had a single friend in my life
  > I can barely imagine the possibility of being able to ask a favor from someone and even receive something
  > My life has been a series of rejections

I'm going to say this, and I mean it genuinely, so please do not find this insensitive:

What if you went to lunch with someone, and the first things they said to you were those 3 quotes at the top?

You'd probably much rather hear something like:

  > I haven't had much luck making friends, YET
  > In the past, I've not been very good at asking others for help, and sometimes I get afraid if I did, they might not give it
  > I've been through a lot of hardships, SO FAR

One of the most impactful things a mentor once told me is:

  > "We are the stories we tell ourselves."

I want to genuinely ask you, to give "telling yourself a different story" a try. You might be surprised at how well you can "fake it 'til you make it!"

Sorry to hear that life has been a struggle for you and that you've not had a good support system to aid you.

But it doesn't have to stay that way -- every day you live & breathe is an opportunity to start the first chapter of a very different story...